One day you’re a diamond and then you’re a stone

The last two weeks have been ridiculous.  The Brother got himself some nasty ass shit that kicked his ass pretty badly.  People die from what he had…but he beat it.  But he was super super sick.  I’m used to his never ending stream of respiratory bullshit but this took things to a whole new level.

One of my good friends found out her husband, a guy in his 40’s has a mass on his bladder.  Another lost a member of her inner circle to cancer of the freaking everything.  I think she didn’t have it in her stomach and that was it.   I saw this woman two months ago and she was in remission and doing just fine.  Then it roared back.  She went into the hospital on Tuesday, hospice on Friday and was gone the following Monday.  Whiskey.  Tango.  Foxtrot.  There are seriously three or four other people in my life who are dealing with similar serious serious shit right now.  Whiskey.  Tango.  Foxtrot.

Another situation has resolved itself.  My friends in San Marcos returned to their home yesterday.  I really didn’t think I would be writing that sentence two days ago.  This is their home at 30 seconds in, with the fire tornado in the background and the fire truck in her driveway. The audio is about a different house in a different neighborhood. The fire fighters are walking around in her backyard in some of the other video.

And on a much more minor note, I strained the holy hell out of my hamstring two weeks ago and it still hasn’t resolved.  I was going to put some gas in the truck and then go see Cousin Jeanne at the Clayton Art and Wine Festival.  I loaded Bill up in the truck and headed down to the gas station.  Well, the truck had other ideas and took a powder at the pump.  The battery was dead.  It was 10am two Sundays ago.  I called AAA to all that bitch back home and I think they ordered a tow from Reno.  It took over an hour to get there.  Funny, they never sent me a “How did we do” survey on that tow.  The driver was great, AAA dropped the ball.


Well, the gas station guy wants me to push the truck away from the pumps even though it’s Sunday morning the business is light.  Like an asshole I agree.  I should have told him I buy hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of gas from him and deal with it or I’ll go to the guy next door who has the same prices.  Hindsight.  We push the truck away from the pump.  I have to door open so I can reach in and steer it.  Then comes time to hop up in the truck and brake because we are now in the driveway which is sloped towards the street.  And the truck is rolling a little faster.

Did I mention I rode 90 miles the day before?  Over Mt. Diablo?  Yeah, that matters in this story.  I didn’t have any “hop” in my legs and missed.  I caught my right heel and got stuck.  And the truck kept rolling.  And I could feel the tearing in my hamstring.  First thought “drop out”.  Then I would be run over by my own pick up truck.  Even stupider than the situation I was in.  I pulled hard to see if I could pull myself up with my arms as the hamstring tore more.  Finally I took a hop with the leg that was down and shoved my shoulder into the truck and stopped it.  Did I mention Bill was sitting up in the truck the whole time?  I’m still badly hurt two weeks later in spite of some really great ART work but my truck isn’t wrecked and my dog did not go rolling or running out into traffic and get killed so I’m calling it a win.

In Birmingham they love the Governor

This guy is the gift that keeps on giving.


I just don’t think it gets any better than this. Of course if you’ve been following his friend Sean Hannity at all, yes, it does get better. The truth is, there is no good news out there. If you want to know the truth you have to go out and read about it on your own.

Now I didn’t have the ability to search Bundy’s title from here but this guy did.  Unfortunately he broke the first rule of title and didn’t run out his legals.  (Click the links etc, I know OTG is going to)  It’s only 10 acres, but….   Looks like he has an account as well.

This is arguably the funniest bit on the whole thing.  Not really funny haha.


Don your crown and cleanse the nation

There’s some bullshit brewing down in the Nevada desert.  It almost came to a head last weekend but the BLM was wise enough to pull back before it blew up.  All kinds of armed nutjobs from Idaho (the next frontier of gun toting wingnuts) brought their guns and set up positions.  I say send these asshats to Afghanistan.  I doubt a single one of them has actually served our country and right now their behavior is treasonous.   Yet the Right Wing clings to them as if they were “patriots”.  They aren’t.  They are criminals.  And Cliven Bundy is a criminal too, and a liar.  And this one is for Auntie, yes, he’s a Mormon.

The Right will tell you that this guy’s family owned this property since before God or something.  Truth, Mexico owned that land and sold it to, wait for it, The United States of America in 1848.  He says he doesn’t recognize the United States of America but he has an American flag behind him.  He maintains that the State of Nevada and Clark County own the land even though that is fantasy.  I’ve had Right Wing nut jobs actually tell me he had clear title to the land.  Truth is, he never ever owned that land.  And the thought that it belongs to the State of Nevada is in direct opposition to the Nevada State Consititution which states in Article 1, Section 2

Sec:?2.??Purpose of government; paramount allegiance to United States.??All political power is inherent in the people[.] Government is instituted for the protection, security and benefit of the people; and they have the right to alter or reform the same whenever the public good may require it. But the Paramount Allegiance of every citizen is due to the Federal Government in the exercise of all its Constitutional powers as the same have been or may be defined by the Supreme Court of the United States; and no power exists in the people of this or any other State of the Federal Union to dissolve their connection therewith or perform any act tending to impair[,] subvert, or resist the Supreme Authority of the government of the United States. The Constitution of the United States confers full power on the Federal Government to maintain and Perpetuate its existance [existence], and whensoever any portion of the States, or people thereof attempt to secede from the Federal Union, or forcibly resist the Execution of its laws, the Federal Government may, by warrant of the Constitution, employ armed force in compelling obedience to its Authority.

Bundy’s Mormon family homesteaded that land in 1880 supposedly but he did not own it.  He never owned it.  All he had was a lease with the BLM to graze his cattle.  Nothing more.  I love when people say somebody has “clear title”.  I know there is no such thing as “clear title”.  Title is always subject to at the very least property taxes.  And it rolls from there.  Maybe his leasehold was clear title but that’s not freehold title you asshats.

I’m sick of these asshats, I’m sick of these freaks with guns arming themselves against basically the Park and Rec department of the United States of America.  I am an American.  I want every one of these people arrested.  I want the cattle sent to auction to pay for my resources that are being wasted and I want to spend time with real Americans, not these traitors.

Which gets me to what I’ve actually been thinking about this morning.  More violence has be imparted on our country by Right Wing extremists than by Al Qaeda since 9/11.  Once you add in 9/11 you have to add in Timothy McVeigh.  They both blew up buildings, Al Qaeda just made a bigger mess than McVeigh did.  Although Al Qaeda didn’t kill children in a pre-school so I think you have to call that one even.

Threats are threats, no matter how they are cloaked.  The truth is there is no news or journalism out there any more.  Only propaganda and entertainment.  Enough is enough.

They told me I was going to lose the fight

I got exactly one thing done this weekend.  One.  I fiddle farted around with a bunch of things but only one got finished.  I was pretty much numb and sleep walking up until I gave blood yesterday and then I came back to life.

I went out onto the healthcare marketplace and bought insurance.  And it was no big deal.  It took about 10 minutes.  The hardest part was figuring out that the system didn’t like Chrome and wanted Safari.  Once I got through that it was no big deal.  It worked smoothly like any other website.  Well almost any.

Because with all of the hullabaloo about how difficult everything was, it wasn’t hard at all.  I got the perfect policy for me.  I don’t have to screw around with any of that 20%, 30%, 40%, 50%, 60%, 70% bullshit.  My policy is simple.  I pay $6350 out of pocket and then it goes to 100%.  And I get three visits per year for free.  So if I get hit by a car, I have it will cost me $6350.  I get some shitty disease, it will cost me $6350.  If I keep rolling like I’ve been rolling, it costs me the premiums and that’s it.

Now I would prefer that this was built into the tax system and I could just go to any Dr. and get fixed like it was in Germany and Italy, but because a bunch of dumbasses that haven’t ever gone more than 50 miles from their birthplace don’t get it, that’s not on the table.  This makes Obama the worst socialist ever.

I just want to point out to all of those people who acted like every website should work perfectly every time that The Brother will be here in California for my birthday this year.  He didn’t want to be.  He got up at 2:30 in the morning to buy Kate Bush tickets.  She is performing in London for the first time in freaking forever.  35 years.  That’s freaking forever.  He had tickets in his queue and while they system was verifying his credit card, the website locked up, threw him out and the 22 shows, 77,000 tickets sold out from under him.

So all of you asshats complaining about the healthcare websites, you can log back in and get health insurance.  Kate Bush is still sold out.  Maybe.  Bookies have her at 5/2 that she adds shows outside of London.

But here I am in prison

I feel like a drunken Irish folk song is in order.

I certainly got punched in the gut today. Quite honestly, this one is as bad as Beauregard.


Norman and his legendary lick granulomas.  Everyone that met him had a solution for his lick granulomas.  Put this on it, do that, isn’t there something you can do?  Dr. Johnson said I would never solve them and I didn’t.  He died with two bloody hocks.  Bloody from his own incessant licking.

I had recently done some reading up on them.  I thought if I got a deal ahead I would take him to UC Davis to have the laser treatment, the only thing known to work, but that day never came.

Norman had been a little slow to get up for the last couple of weeks and had been giving me some crap about getting off the couch at night, going outside, getting in his crate.  Dinner was the only thing he got up for without giving me any crap.

I took him into the vet today.  He got to the scale and collapsed.  I was sure he was working it for his SAG card putting on the performance of his life, but in truth he held on as long as he could, and collapsed at the vet’s office.


The tumor was larger than his heart.  If you met Norman, you know that his heart was enormous.  That dog had the heart of a lion, but it was also a heart of gold.  And the tumor was bigger.  It pressed against his lung nearly collapsing the lung.  It pushed through his ribs making them look like an accident victim’s X-ray.  And his rib bones were compromised.  And like Beauregard, and Miss Cleo and Ike and Xica, there was nothing for me to do.  I asked how long he had and she said that she could load him up with pain meds and I could take him home for the night.  I wouldn’t do that to him.  I let him go.

Big man, you weren’t supposed to stay here.  You hated my brother until he found a package of turkey franks.  Then you sold you soul to him.  I loved you for that.  You took it upon yourself to protect me from all comers.  You were a good dog.  You always came to check on me.  And you were a bit of prankster.  You spilled coffee all over me yesterday.  I was pissed at you at the time.  Now I wish you would spill this beer on me.

Godspeed my handsome man, I am going to miss you.

We did the monster mash

I kind of love that the guy whose name I did not mention also had his name not mentioned by Rachel Maddow.  And I thought I was so freaking clever.


As well it should.

Then there is this little gem which just makes me smile.

Part of me is sick of youtube cutesy pranks but this one is clever.  Some of the other ones are just stupid.  This one is not stupid.

And I have to say the news is pretty amusing to me right now.

CNN spent about 10 days being all about the missing plane while Fox News continued to “report” on Obamacare and I can’t remember the other fake controversy irrelevant thing they were talking about.  The minute it looked like there might be a terrorist link to the flight they were on it like stink on…well, they’re just stink so let’s leave it at that.

A night flight, how would you know the pilots changed course, and off you go into the wild blue yonder, forever.  Scary shit.

King Nothing

Bad people die every day in this world.  This week a really bad man died.  Good riddance.

While part of me would like to see a protest of such a magnitude that the march on Washington would be dwarfed, a bigger part of me says the most poignant thing that can be done is nothing.  Not give him any ink.  Not say his name.  And not protest his funeral if there is one.  There are reports that there will be no funeral.  What a bunch of pussies.

Because he is not worth the gasoline to drive there.  He is not worth the time off work.  He is not worth the time at all.  He is not worth the keystrokes I type out right now.  And his afterlife is not going the way he thought it would.

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.  Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” ~Martin Luther King Jr.

A doleful damsel I heard cry

One of my biggest fears came to fruition for 239 people over the China Sea on Friday.  You have no idea how much I have to steel myself to get on an airplane any more.  It’s kind of amazing that this world is so big and so small all at the same time.  It’s hard to get away with anything with all of the surveillance cameras and cell phones and GPS and everything else.  But drop a 777 in the China Sea and poof!  It’s gone!

The last time something like this happened Air France dumped one into the drink.  And they screwed up and dumped it in the drink.  That shit scares the hell out of me.  It’s easy to blame the pilots and it was pilot error, the reporter says “He’s on 32 years old” her voice dripping with judgement.  The last words were the Captain asking “but what’s going on?”  He had 11,000 flight hours.  The 32 year old first officer had 2900 flight hours.  He didn’t make the right decision but I think a hero is a hero and Bonin wasn’t.  And the flight went down.

That’s the thing.  How do you if there is a Sully or a Bonin in your cockpit?  99% of the time it just doesn’t matter, but in the oft chance it does…it matters.

The thing is, where that plane went down was such a rugged place in the ocean that it took over two years to find it all.  The underwater mountains were so severe that sonar was useless.

The idea of a watery grave is a little freaky to me.  I’d like to think I’m long gone and can watch from somewhere else by then.  So yeah, the lost Malaysia flight makes me itchy.  And sad for the families who probably have at least several months in front of them of waiting for their loved ones to be recovered.

A preconceived idea of what it all meant

As a country, we really need to stop being so stupid.

First up, the ADA.

Seriously.  It’s not that hard.  And furthermore, it’s actually easy if you’re not an asshole.  Don’t be an asshole.

Texas, that bastion of all things patriotic and christian.  And one of the states that scares me when I go there.  So in keeping with that Christian theme, here’s a little something from the Marine Corps Times.   Sure glad that asshat supports our troops and all.  Thankfully shit got pretty sideways for them on yelp.

I’m sick and tired of the Red States talking out of both sides of their mouths.  Obviously that inbred hick down at the Riverside Inn did not know what the ADA said.   And oh yeah, the guy has the dog because he served our country and can’t sleep now because of the PTSD and nightmaires.  So yeah, throw him out, don’t serve him and call yourself a patriot.

Rand Paul.  Home of the fifth highest poverty rate in the nation.  Right behind Mississippi, New Mexico Louisiana and Arkansas.  The poverty rate in Kentucky is 19.4%.  1 in 5 Kentuckians are living in poverty.  Mr. Paul, you are not doing a good job.

I hated Trent Lott but he was good for Mississippi.  He porkbarreled more projects out of Louisiana and into Mississippi than anyone and the void he left is noticeable.   I don’t approve of taking Navy projects that belong in New Orleans and moving them to Mississippi but that’s what a good politician does.  Rand Paul has run his mouth and done nothing.  Shame on him.

On to Arizona.  Shame on you too.  This thinly veiled discriminatory bill you’ve brought to the table in the name of religion is pure bullshit.  But let’s leave the calling out the Christian hypocrits to professionals.  Ann Rice teed off on her Facebook page.  For those not in the know, her son Christopher is gay and was just named one of the 10 most eligible bachelors.

Our post commending actress Ellen Page for her courage in coming out as gay attracted a lot of hostility and hate and hate speech — as well as positive and substantive comments. I have banned many from the page today. I will no longer tolerate hate speech in the guise of Christian belief with the usual irresponsible pick and choose bible quotes and talk of “sin” and hellfire. I have had enough of it, and I think the world has had enough of it too. Again, I commend Ellen Page for her bravery in coming out. I hope more celebrities and public figures will be inspired to do so. Anyone who thinks this does not matter is deceiving himself or herself. It matters very much. Gay people in all walks of life suffer from bigotry, bias, superstition, and ignorance. Hats off to Ellen Page! (And please do NOT come here to tell us publicly that you “don’t care.” If you don’t care, don’t expect us to care that you don’t care!).

And she didn’t stop there.  Don’t know who Mike is but he got served.

Mike, in my experience many Christians are extremely aggressive towards those they despise and seek to control and change. They spend millions in America trying to interfere with a woman’s right to choose and a gay person’s civil rights. They are vocal and “in your face” with their hate of gays and other strong religious biases. If they would respect the rights and dignity of those who do not share their belief system, it would be better for everyone. But sadly, they don’t. And when they bring hate speech to this page, I will delete and ban them.

Mike, I don’t think the aggression and hostility of Christians towards those they condemn can be compared in any way to gay rights activists. Gay rights activists don’t spend millions trying to persecute and demonize others or oppress them in terms of civil rights. I hope you do some research on this topic. We have a serious problem in this country with aggressive Christians violating our separation of church and state, and campaigning to oppress women and gays, and sometimes children.

I think we are in a time in America when we must demand that all people claiming to be Christian take full moral responsibility for their belief system and the harm it has done historically and the harm it continues to do in our country. I see no reason to give Christians a pass on any of this.

The thing is, this behavior is not what it actually taught in the Bible.  It’s how the Bible has been twisted by people seeking their own agenda.  God is love.  That’s what it says in the Bible.  And God will do the judging, not us.  Love your neighbor.  Feed the poor.  And my favorite part, don’t be a hypocrite.  That beam in your eye.  Yeah.

Matthew 15:7-9

You hypocrites! Well did Isaiah prophesy of you, when he said: “‘This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me; in vain do they worship me, teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.’” 

Of course let’s have a little chuckle at the expense of the legislators down in Alabama.

Here is the most disgusting piece of legislation introduced last week, if not for the State of Arizona.  Nice work for a freshman state rep.  Do catch the video at the end.  Dude needs to be taken out to the woodshed, which happened.

The point is stop it.  Stop being asshats.  Stop thinking the world owes you something, it doesn’t.  Start contributing to society in a positive meaningful way.  Do nice things.  Be nice.  Turn the other goddamn cheek and quit blaming others for your situation.

I met Arthur Boorman I believe two years ago in San Diego where he walked on stage.  They gave him a speaking coach so he could pursue a speaking career.  If he can do this, seriously what is your excuse.

Safe and Sound

I can’t leave this one alone.

Everyone is outraged over the killing of the young giraffe in Copenhagen.  While I am not happy about the killing of a perfectly healthy young animal, I do understand why they did it.  It’s best described in this article.

Giraffes are super cute.  Like elephants, they delight us as children.  They are in many of our children’s books and we learn about them at a young age.  They are fascinating creatures with their long necks and doe eyes.  I get it.  I could barely look at the article about it.  But…

Don’t be outraged about the killing of a healthy giraffe when you had a burger for lunch.  Don’t freaking doing it.  In 2011 65 billion land animals were killed for food.  New flash: They were all healthy animals.  The unhealthy ones are removed from the food chain and just killed.   Marius the giraffe could not be kept at the Copenhagen zoo and there was no place to send him where he would be assured health and safety.  Apparently castration doesn’t work well on zoo animals.  At the end of the day, the Copenhagen zoo did what is done 65 billion times a year in the world.  And they fed their lions.  They did not waste him, his life had value to the lions.  It’s the circle of life.  And you don’t get to complain about it if you had chicken salad for lunch.