Jaws was never my scene and I don’t like Starwars

OK, I said I had an announcement coming and well, here it is. I’ve decided to ride in the LiveStrong Challenge in San Jose as part of Team Fatty. I’ve been following his site and his wife’s battle for about a year now. I’m fat, I ride and I hate cancer. It was a natural. I’ll be riding what’s called a metric century. 100km or 65 miles…so you don’t have to do the math. I know many PBE readers are out of work, but this is a battle that will affect most of us somehow at some point in our lives. Even $5 helps me reach my team goal and helps Team Fatty meet their goal. With the hits that PBE has, if everyone who came here clicked for $5 we would blow the goals away.  So CLICK HERE and join up! Thanks for your support!

Along the forest road there’s hundreds of cars

Sometimes when days get going in their own direction, it’s best to just ride it out and see where it takes you. Yesterday was one of those days. I started out in Brentwood. I rolled up on a new assignment. Thankfully most of the new stuff we’re getting right now is vacant. This one was no exception. It had been on the market for over 6 months as a short sale. I got there and the old agent’s lock box and signs were still there. I called them to let them know that 1) we’re taking this over and 2) I pulled your key 3) come pick up your box and sign before I trash it out. These poor schmucks had this thing going back and forth for all this time on a short sale. They had a buyer and were waiting to hear back from the bank. Uh, I think you have their answer. Sorry. It’s good for us, but Jeez, what a waste, they could have sold it and gotten it off the books and now they’ll carry it for probably another 60 days. There’s just too much volume. Just like there was too much volume in the title companies 3 years ago. Oh, it’s the same loans. Nevermind.  When I was at Morgan Stanley they used to tell us that in the next 15 years we would see the largest transference of wealth in the history of this country when the baby boomers moved on to the great beyond. It’s been transfered alright…to the great beyond.

Anyway, I came home to meet a chimney sweep. There’s nothing I hate more than “We’ll be there between 12-2”. It says to me that you think your time is more important than mine so you aren’t going to make an appointment, you’re going to make me sit with my thumb up my ass until you get around to showing up. At 1:56 the phone rings. We’re going to be about 30 to 45 minutes late. Really? You just now figured that out? Because I’ve been sitting here for an hour and fifty six minutes waiting for your dumb ass and now you want me to wait another 30 to 45 minutes? Your cut off is 45 minutes because I have to be in a crappy neighborhood in the daylight to take pictures this afternoon and truth be told, I could have been doing it over that last hour and fifty six minutes I’ve been putzing around the house waiting for your jerkoffs to show up. At 2:46 the phone rings again. We’re not going to make it today. Really? Did you just figure that out? Now I want a real appointment. I want the first appointment in the day. I want your dumb asses here first thing in the morning. How about January 5 from 8-10? How about January 5 AT 8am? Yes 8-10. Yes 8AM. Don’t think I’ll be sitting around that morning waiting for these knuckleheads. I may even call someone else to do the job before January 5 because it’s damned cold here. How cold you ask? Currently 28 degrees. In the burbs. I’m sure my hoses are frozen again. I have to go out and turn on all the water in a minute to break everything up. I wouldn’t be surprised if the dog’s water has a thin veneer of ice on it. I’m not going out on the bike this morning. One of my friends called a couple of days ago and reminded me that there was black ice on Ygnacio and to be careful. Black ice, bicycle. Not good. Although I did suggest that I would not get road rash if I hit, I’d just slide. Probably not funny in reality.

So after I finally got to Hayward to see perhaps the worst property I’ve ever taken over, I decided I was close enough to the City to get in some trouble go Christmas shopping. On the way into the City traffic was terrible. It was after all around 5pm on a Friday night. Finally, as I saw the Vermont sign I thought “Wonder if the Brother is home”. He puts together a rockin’ Christmas tree every year and really it’s worth seeing. It was. Loki was a riot on his own turf and admonished him repeatedly that I loved his little ass but he had to learn to be nice to Bubba. He looked at me loving as if to say “will you get my squeak toy?” The Brother has got some very very cool toys. 61 inch plasma or lcd or whatever the hell it is. Freaking big. Very cool. New iMac. Blazing speed. Say no more. Game console. What is this Mortal Combat? If he didn’t have a party to go to, I would still be there playing Mortal Combat in yesterday’s clothes with Loki while the Brother slept.

The party was in honor of one of the last rats to be tossed out of a sinking ship. I know these folks so I crashed. I got to hang with Legally Blonde and see this house I’d been hearing about for years. It’s a Sears and Roebuck house built in Boston and shipped around the horn. With the sort of amazing views you get only in the Potrero district. It’s pretty much the same view they have at Bloom’s. So I hear. I’ve never been there. That I remember. Then and only then did I go Christmas shopping. Christmas shopping should not be done without alcohol.  I knew exactly where to go and what I wanted. I was done by 9:30 and heading back home.  That’s how it’s done.

I still want a hula hoop

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Well, I’ve been holding off on this because to me it’s really depressing. I know it means that a lot of people are probably going to be hittin’ the bricks and I know the quality that two formerly great organizations will soon be providing. Dinty Moore bails out. The Burgermeister wins and the customers lose again. And the workers? Thanks for playing our game. I’m sure all of you as of Monday formerly LandAm title folks have been seeing The Evil Empire’s agents of destruction skulking around your facilities. You know what’s next. Bottom line if you didn’t catch on with Old Repulsive 20 years ago and stay put, you’re screwed. And I really feel bad for all of you. I’ve got to give Old Repulsive credit, they’ve really tried hard to keep their core together. They haven’t been lopping off heads willy nilly like the Evil Empire or even the Bloodless Empire. How’s that First India Ltd. thing going?


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That’s so much better. I’ve been trying to get over to the City to do some Christmas type stuff since Wednesday. I don’t see myself making it today either which puts me over there on the weekend. I became a Realtor so I could screw off this time of year dammit! OK, that’s not right. I became a Realtor because I’m a malcontent and couldn’t stomach the corporate wankers who are running business any more. I was hoping that Christmas shopping during the week would just be a perk. I could probably get over there today if I didn’t have a chimney sweep coming at noon, and I’m itching to get out on the bike. It’s currently raining.

I took the bike in for a tune-up or check up or whatever they’re called. It was supposed to be $75. The boys said it didn’t need much and charged me $45 for the work and then put a new chain on it because it needed it. Hopefully my gearing issues are over with. Big announcement about the bike and my ass later today.

Those of you who have been here for a while know the battle I’ve been fighting with getting weight on Rita. Well, I looked at her earlier this week and thought “Damn, that dog filled out”. And fill out she did. She looks awesome. She’s all muscle and very lean but you can’t see her ribs any more and her chest has filled out. Her coat is spectacular. I wonder what could have been with her if I had her from the beginning. Her paws are huge compared to the rest of her. I think her growth was stunted by bad nutrition when she was a puppy. Too bad, she’s a gorgeous dog. I kind of wish I had Bubba from the start too. His socialization is terrible. He actually trembles before I take him outside. He shakes uncontrollably in the truck and he was a pile of Jello before I took him into Sports Basement to go to the bike shop there. The boys at the bike shop were great and got down on his level and loved on him very gently. It relaxed him. We checked out a few other things while we were in the store and he definitely loosened up. I’ll keep taking him to stores and events where he can go until he gets over himself and learns that 1) men won’t hurt him 2) getting to go is fun. I’d sure like 10 minutes to go Pete Rose on the asshole that screwed up that dog. I’d only need 10 minutes and my old TPS.

Right is only half of what’s wrong

File this under It’s About Damned Time.  And we may have another NASCAR Teddy Worst Person in the World nomination.  Did I read that right?  The former Chief Executive of Lawyers Title is calling the LandAm board out on that one?  Good.  They deserve it.  Now why does NASCAR Teddy still have a job?  Why haven’t the stockholders tossed the board.  Why oh why?

I was surprised to watch the Rachel Maddow show the other night and find her agreeing with PBE…I mean she didn’t mention me specifically but she talked about how whether we like or agree with the President, you still can’t throw shoes at our guy.   It reminded me of how Xica da Silva was at the dog parks.  At home, Beauregard’s ass was hers.  24/7.  However, if you were the unfortunate four legged schmuck who chose to pick on him at the dog park, your ass was hers too.  Because his ass was hers, it was hers to kick, not anyone else’s.  The only fights that dog ever won were the ones where Xica took point.  So, yeah, Bush’s ass is ours to kick.  I personally think he’s guilty of criminal wrongdoing that I hope the next administration has the balls to pursue.  But don’t throw your Iraqi shoe at him, because his ass is ours to kick.

The Guru, an old friend of mine, used to say that I would let a situation spin out of control just so I’d have a good story to tell later.  Don’t let the Guru fool you.  He was right there next to me watching the story develop.  Yesterday, I ended up with a Guru quality story.  It all started innocently enough.  I met my client out at one of his sites and gave him his HUD and escrow refund check.  (The package I received from the Fidelity owned escrow company was a complete embarrassment, but I digress)  Then we went over to another property that just came on the market.  I knew it wasn’t for him, but I was hoping the price would entice one of his buddies to get in the water with us.  As we stood at the property and chatted he said “Want to go get something to eat?”  Sure.  I let him pick.  He’s from New Delhi and I knew there was an Indian strip mall (really) up the road.  Sure enough, that was his pick.  We got there and the restaurant was closed on Tuesdays.  Drat.  He knew of another place and we were just about to get back in our cars and head away when we saw a sign that said “Curry Corner”.  What’s that?  I don’t know, let’s check it out.  Fijian food.  Have you ever had Fijian food?  Nope.  Want to try it?  Sure.  A word to the wise, try Fijian food.  Especially at Curry Corner.  First off, yelp is full of crap.  It’s Fijian food, not Indian or Pakistani or anything else.  Saras is Fijian and so is the food.  Second, this is the real deal.  There are two tables.  The restaurant is the size of a small suitcase.  It looks like something from another world.  She has no refrigerator.  She has a freezer.  She brings it in fresh and she cooks it.  If she has some at the end of the day, she gives it to the local homeless in exchange for minor chores…taking out the trash etc.  She told us a story about the day a big handsome cop came in.  She asked him how he had heard of the place.  He was talking to some random homeless guy in the park and asked him where he got his food and he told him, so the cop thought he’d check it out.  Yesterday she had fish, chicken or goat, some rice that was awesome, curried potatoes that were off the hook and a stewed salad thing.  Fijian food brings the heat and God knows I love me some heat.  There is no menu and we didn’t know what the bill was until the end.  Because we didn’t know until the end, we didn’t know that between us we wouldn’t have enough cash.  We each had $7 in our pockets.  Of course a little postage stamp of a place like that doesn’t take credit cards.  My client had just returned from India via England.  He asked her if she traveled and she said she did several times a year.  I have 10 pounds sterling, you know that’s right around $17 right now.  Will you take that?  Or we could go to an ATM and come back.  She thought about it for a little bit, he threw in a $5 bill on top of it and my lunch was paid for with 10 pound sterling yesterday.

Don’t know what to do, now that pink has turned to blue

Well, the Garden City Group out of Seattle (I presume as opposed to NY) will be handling the Mercury Companies Bankruptcy. Looks like some up to the minute shiz can be found at the new website. Mercury Companies Bankruptcy. For all of you who gave me a bad time about the schedules, they’re located on that website in downloadable form. Now off my ass! I told you it was public information.

Looks like The Evil Empire has the blessing of the Cornhusker State to Hüsker Dü their way to 46% of the market, or so they think. Gack. Damn I wish I could get this thing to do an umlaut.  Thanks dolphyngyrl.

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On a sunday afternoon with the remote

Praise the Lord and pass the Ammunition
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This is why I can’t take this jackholes seriously.  I mean, seriously!?!

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Aren’t the Secret Service supposed to jump in there and spirit him away?  They seemed a little slow to the party to me.  Then again, I wonder if the Secret Service took a huge cut in pay, have to work more hours and got their homes foreclosed on.  That would explain it.  Just another bizarre moment in this Administration, although I give the guy credit, he can duck with the best of ’em.  Besides, we want this guy healthy.  The last thing we need is Dick Cheney grumbling something about “I am in control now.”  OK, I’m still a little uneasy 27 years after Alexander Haig said that.

This guy just makes me laugh, in that nervous sort of way you laugh when you really want to cry.  OK, I’ll quote him.

Regulators in the R/E industry of all stripes – LandAmerica, a big title insurance company, has filed for bankruptcy.  Why?  Because instead of actually performing title searches title companies have been outsourcing the work to foreigners in places like India, where the so-called “search” has turned into nothing more than a quick dig through electronic records. Of course when there are real claims on the title the company is then on the hook and can’t pay; instant boom! Where is the investigation of this obvious misrepresentation of what the purchaser of that policy bought?  LALALALALALALALALALA.

It makes me want to jump up and down and scream THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!!! for emphasis, we reiterate:

instead of actually performing title searches title companies have been outsourcing the work to foreigners in places like India, where the so-called “search” has turned into nothing more than a quick dig through electronic records.

And I got supposedly fired laid off  for speaking the truth saying that.  I just want to stand at the top of the nearest building beat my chest and scream.  Karl Denninger is our Best Person in the World today.

This guy has a real good take on the whole thing, or if nothing else, he has a great graphic.  I’m guessing the only Christmas turkey NASCAR Teddy is passing out this year comes in your pay envelope.

In my quest to find decent footage of the shoe flinging incident, I ran into this clip that just makes me laugh.  Now, as much as I can’t stand Bush, and I truly hate the guy, I still don’t want someone else to disrespect the office.  It’s just one of those things.  He has disrespected it plenty on his own and history will not remember him fondly.  Still, throwing shoes at the POTUS is not okay in my little twisted world.  However, that being said, the sound effects are truly funny in this version.

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I don’t know what the hell they’re talking about but at any moment somebody ought to say Sabado Gigante or GOOOOAAAAAAAALLLLL!

You better not pout, you better not cry

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Nothin’ but quality here at PBE.  Actually, this is a set up for today’s adventures.  First, I didn’t get my bike ride in yesterday.  Headus up the Assitis.  So I thought it would be a good idea to get that in today before it started raining.  I left before it started raining, however 19 minutes into a two hour ride it started raining.  I learned about riding in the rain today.  One of the worst parts is where the water runs down your back into your tights and settles on your gel seat.  Just sayin’.  My knee warmers did not stay up in the rain and I had two stripes of frozen legs by the time I got home.  That wasn’t too cool either.  And I really hate balaclavas although I think mine might have saved my life today.  I now have to figure out how to take care of a bike that’s been in the rain for an hour and a half, because instead of doing 30 miles, I went with 20 miles, considering the temperature (48 when I left the house, 42 when I returned) and the rain.  Anyway, the ride was miserable, but I got it in.  In the next day or two, you’ll understand the importance of all that.  I got home in time to see the Dolphins finish off the 49ers.  I started to watch some of the Raider game, but Jees Louise, sitting in that weather watching the Raiders getting their asses handed to them had to be the epitome of  insult to injury.  So I took (getting back to our point) the Hellhoundz down the Wags and Whiskers to see Santa…and get their picture taken.  Suffice it to say, it looks like Santa will be traveling with Satan’s Reindeer this year.  Santa is large and in charge with Cerubus and Hades.  You better be good, Yo!

I know, it’s not like that.  It was a fund raiser for the White Kitty Foundation, and well, we’re big fans of white kitties, although they save all sorts of critters…and well, we’re big fans of that too.  The photographer, Tonya Perme, was awesome, my guys were a little nervous as this was something new and they are both rescues so they both have their hinkiness…simply, she was great with them.  She’s also a big fan of the dogs with the dots, that’s my kind of photographer.

The hot july moon saw everything

I told her I would mention them and I forgot yesterday. I met a gal at Darioush named Marisol. We can use her real name because we’re talking about a real project. The project is Merlove. It’s a documentary in response to Sideways. You know, where Miles says he’s not drinking any more Merlot and all of America stopped drinking Merlot…except the Wine Dog.

No, that’s not me on Thursday. Anyway, I checked out their trailers and their blog and their flickr and I can’t wait to catch up with this film. I was watching the flickr slide show that opens up in Seattle and then to my amazement there was a photo of the illusive Bob Betz. He is the genius behind many of the great wines of the Woodinville area. There’s the Betz Family Winery and he consults on freaking just about anything worth drinking from up there. I don’t know how the guy does it. He originally got some grapes from Delille Cellars (a great place to start…D2, that’s all I’m saying) in exchange for warehouse space and went from there. I didn’t get to meet him when I was up there, but he was kind of omnipresent. Anyway, they clearly did their homework (hell they went to France.) I’d watch for this one.

It’s like watching two fighters slug it out

This guy has been following the LandAm 1031 exchange company failure. Do you file class actions against failed companies? I’m sure NASCAR Teddy was the President and CEO of that bitch too. No golden parachute for NASCAR Teddy, just hit the bricks like the rest of us. Where’s the Board of Directors? Game over. Kick this AssHat to the curb. How much does unemployment pay in Virginia?

This has nothing to do with anything, but I picked it up on my alerts and well, it makes us laugh. And stuff like this is why I’m an Ahnold fan. Because trust me, I see it several times a week, folks who had no idea how to handle money messing around with the home loans on the advice of some Loan Officer Snake Oil salesman who are now packing their shit and moving to an apartment. And I see the shit they leave behind. A lot of the time I think “what if you didn’t buy all this shit and just paid your mortgage instead?” They have brand new cars and all the latest toys….and now no house. Well, I’ve got a 14 year old truck, an 8 years old car, a 7 year old big screen and I’m current on my mortgage. It’s Reagonomics hard at work. Don’t educate the people, just sell them shit they don’t need. I hope Ahnold’s program takes root, it’s a good one.

More Hard Work

I’ve been working the dogs out pretty hard on their drills. Rita is coming along really well. It’s like everything from school finally stuck. She sits beautifully and watches me for her next command. Her down is finally turned the corner. I can open the back door with squirrels present and tell her to sit/stay and she waits for the command before she explodes into the yard to run her perimeter checks. Bubba is just now sitting at the door, but he’ll get there too. The next class doesn’t start until January so we have some time to brush up on our skills. Bubba’s tummy is still problematic, but I think the duck food has been helping and I’ve been putting hot water on it to make it mushy and slow down his eating even more. He’s a gulper. I’ve been feeding them separately for about three weeks. Rita wants to rush out in the morning and he wants to eat first, so it’s working out pretty well. Dinner is a little trickier, but I get it to work. We’re due for rain, I’m hoping to get out on the bike today before it starts…