Coconut Telegraph,  Corporate Wankers,  Cycling,  Title Insurance

Look at your lipstick, all ’round your face, everything you do, is in bad taste

I have to say, yesterday was the single most insane day since I started this site. Generally, the way things go around here, I post once a day on PBE. Sometimes I have to look around for something to write about. Those of you who have been here a while know that I’ve come dangerously close to having to flash the girls for lack of content. Yesterday, I couldn’t pump the content out quick enough. There are some jewels down in the comment section. We had almost 100 times the amount of readership yesterday that usually comes in here daily. I’d like to welcome all the new visitors and new users. I think you’ll find that we have a grand time here. And some real players stop by too. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink.

Speaking of players, a gentleman wrote me yesterday who is working on a case against Alliance Title Company. They are looking to make the connection that the wages are due from Mercury Companies. Mercury is trying to lay it in Alliance’s lap along with all the other debt stacked up in the BK case. If you have wage statements (that is the thing you print out from Lawson showing your gross pay, deductions etc.) from your Alliance days that shows Mercury at the top (which I think they all did), please contact:

Mark B. Simpkins
11 Golden Shore, Ste. 430
Long Beach, CA 90802
Tel. (562)436-9631
Fax. (562)436-1467

If you are aware of mortgage fraud that occurred in any particular office, I can hook you up on that one too. Please contact me offline for that one. My contact information is on the “Are you going to eat that?” page, the link is to the left.

If you are one of the poor schmucks that lost their jobs yesterday, I’m sorry. I’ve lost my job twice now, I feel your pain. I hope you were able to shove some away in the bank before this happened. I linked back to some of our discussion from when Alliance Title Company went under. Things you can expect from Mercury Companies now:

  • Nothing
  • Absolutely nothing
  • Bupkiss
  • Nil
  • Nada

If you’re in California, this might be helpful. David Balter is the attorney with the Labor Commission who filed a $21 million dollar suit against Alliance Title Company for wages, vacation pay, and commissions that were not paid. It is illegal in the State of California to not pay wages, vacation pay and commissions due to employees. I’ve looked all over and I can’t find David Balter’s contact information or the copy of the case. I did find the deed to Patty’s mountain house…

Click me! Click me!

And the Alliance bankruptcy petition…


And the Alliance cease and desist from the DOI…


If you’re in Texas or Arizona, I’m not sure where you need to go. If someone could send me that info, I’ll throw it up here.

If Patty Hauptman really resigned yesterday that makes things kind of interesting. She is so morally corrupt that there has to be a personal gain in there for her, so it’s our job, gentle readers, to figure out her angle. On first blush, I think Mercury Companies is about to go BK and she’s trying to dodge either responsibility or culpability or both. Possibly an outside source has been brought in to right the ship. I know a guy they were talking to last year to do just this. I just don’t know if that’s what’s happening. Maybe the line of credit failed after Jerry moved the money into an offshore account and their next step is disappearing to a country that doesn’t extradite for financial crimes…but I digress. Actually if I recall correctly, they dumped the private jet last year.

Privately owned corporations are a pain in the ass to penetrate the corporate veil. BTW, I went through the entire Annual Report for the Bloodless Empire yesterday trying to find their interest in Mercury Companies and couldn’t find it. I’m sure they have a piece of it, it’s just well hidden. They mentioned a financial interest in numerous subsidiaries that were not individually named.

My big ten inch

A couple of days ago, I picked Zuckzilla.


I decided to stuff it due to it’s size. I would of course, have to modify a recipe to Body for Life. I settled on brown rice, tomato, a touch of panko bread crumbs and egg white as a binder. I didn’t have any rice in the house so I went down to Trader Joe’s to pick up rice and tomatoes and a couple of other things. Really a quick little trip. I came home to this:


In my defense, I did not kill my dog last night, although she certainly deserved it.

Ride, Captain Ride

Tuesday I stopped by the local bike shop and picked up these patches that you put inside a gashed tire. It allows you to inflate the tire tube without it pushing through the gash and rupturing again. Pretty cool shit, although it makes me a little nervous when I inflate to over 100lbs of pressure. Anyway, it is working well so far. I’m still nervous. I carry three tubes with me, so I have plenty of room for screw ups, pinched tubes etc. Rita took a new tube and chewed that up yesterday too. I’m thinking that she doesn’t like it when I go on interviews. Anyway, it was over 90 when I left the house. I took half a bottle of Accelerade with me, just because the ride was only an hour. I had been fooling around with the computer on the bike trying to set the time but now the stop watch isn’t working right so I don’t know my time for yesterday. I did the Ygnacio loop. There was a terrible head wind leaving the house. It was a crosswind on the downhill, so I braked the whole way down and didn’t freewheel at all. I did make it back up in 9:42. Not a land speed record, but decent. I’m going around 40 over the weekend. I’m finding that see sawing these rides works better for my body. I need to get the bike fitted next week. It’s not quite right which is negligible on the shorter rides and insufferable over 60 miles.

Keep those comments and emails coming and I’ll share it with the community. And thanks again for stopping by!


  • Mike M.

    Hello Everyone –

    I’m a fan! I’ve been reading your postings for quite some time and my hats are off to what you’ve done here, which to me is no less than “public service” to all former employees of Alliance, Financial, and the other companies Mercury owns, who have been dislocated and victimized by you know who.

    I was a former Area Manager for Alliance who left the company in the right time. I was County Manager for Stewart Title, Alameda County, for a while. Today I run my own operation as part-owner of a Title Company, which owns several business ventures including an escrow company operating in the Bay Area – Union City and Daly City.

    And I couldn’t agree with you more when you said that our industry has never seen it this bad. But one thing I will say: What differentiates a true leader from a phony one is when he or she is tested in the hardest of times.

    And I must say that I have a lot of respect for Ivy (reading her e-mail) and for Jim (at United Title of Texas) at the way they handled their company’s abrupt closing by its parent, Mercury. They did it way different than the Alliance clowns who simply walked away and never returned any phone calls to anyone of their employees.

    I also like the fact that both Ivy and Jim provided their personal cell phone numbers to their employees to answer phone calls if need be. There is no right or wrong way to handle situations like these but you can appreciate a leader who is not afraid to face his or her people to answer their questions and be straightforward with them.

    This is a small industry where people knew everybody else. Our industry is also a cycle where we know this market will turn around and people will come back one by one – in title, in escrow, and we will all find ourselves somehow reconnected, either as co-employees or as competitors.

    But one thing will never change – reputation. And reputation is all we have in this business. And if there’s one positive thing this great market meltdown has done, it has taught us which ones of our title leaders are for real and which ones are just bunch of clowns. NOW WE KNOW!

  • OldTitleGuy

    Rita ATE Zuckzilla?

    Maybe she’s trying to point out that “vegetarian” is an Ojibwa word meaning “Bad Hunter”…

    Maybe the chewing up of the tube was her effort to point out the similarity in taste between rubber and zuccini?

    Smart dog.

  • The Brother

    Zukezilla, we hardly knew ye. No worries, you got one zuke, you got 1,000. Zuke plants are like that. And now we know why 1) MY little bad boy is crated most of the time I’m not home, and 2) nothing edible is left where he can get it. Because I know he will. There is a bowl of lemons and limes easily reachable. I’m waiting for him to go for a lemon. Go dog go.

  • anescrowperson

    Thank you Mike M for properly representing what happened. I’m from Santa Clara county and am proud of the people I worked with and of our management!

Leave a Reply