I’m sure all of you who have television saw the original of this. I think he looks terrible in that video. Actually, I think he’s looked bad for a while now, bad like he’s-going-to-drop-dead-at-any-minute-bad. I hope he doesn’t, at this point he’s kind of the heart of the Democratic Party, the only guy who remembers how to get anything done. I can’t even begin to understand what happened to the Republican Party. They have clearly forgotten about the separation of church and state, which while not in the Constitution, was clearly the intent of the founding fathers. (Do your homework). I reject the cultural and social conservativism they are spewing forth at this point. And for what it’s worth, we aren’t going to cut our way out of this mess, we have to grow our way out. I swear to God I hear one more teabagger spew a bunch of numbers at me about how the government doesn’t create jobs the private sector does I am going to scream at them to dismantle the military industrial complex and call me when they’re done. There. I just got rid of a bunch of government jobs you ignorant assholes. Where do the masses turn for work in tough times? They join the military you idiots. But I digress.
I’m actually here today to talk about cheese.
After I read the article about Clinton’s new vegan diet and how he’d lost 20 pounds and was in better shape than he’d been in years, I thought about maybe it was time for me to think about heading back that way. I was a vegetarian for years. I quit because I wasn’t getting enough protein. I feel better now than I did then. Could I get the protein up high enough to make it work? It would certainly be better for me. I’m getting to be in a little better shape. The cycling is doing that. I’m getting ready to compete in powerlifting again. I laid off last year but I’m ready to go again. Processing….processing….
I went to the google. Vegan bodybuilding diet. Pretty similar to what I would have to do. There’s those crazy Brits. That looks complicated. Robert Cheeke is a vegan bodybuilder, what does that guy eat? That’s doable. And no where does it say I have to stop drinking wine or beer. That’s a plus. But one of the fundamentals of vegan is no cheese. They have substitute soy based cheese that tastes like ass. I hate substitute anything. Veggie burgers chap my hide. Although I was watching an older True Blood last night and Lafayette comes out and delivers Jesus his meal as he announces “I had to see who ordered the veggie burger with bacon.” Which is kind of how I feel about veggie burgers. Always have. And substitute cheese.
I could work around those two issues, but then I thought about my big grill out back. And how amazingly excellent the pork chops with the orange chipotle glaze were last night. Sure I can could vegetables on the grill. I grilled corn on the cob last night too. Asparagus earlier in the week. But I would miss the occasional pork chop. I have mastered chicken breast. I would miss that. I would definitely miss tri-tip. I got a perfect tri-tip from of all places Safeway last week. Safeway should have perfect tri-tips since they are the first ones to ever put one on the grill and cross cut it. I would miss my grill.
Could I go without eggs? I do an omelette or scrambled eggs a couple of times a week. I use one egg and three or four whites. I would miss that. I’d have to make cookies without eggs, those usually taste like the bottom of my boot. We’re not winning here.
Then there’s cheese. That was the back breaker. I love artisan cheese. I love the Cowgirl Creamery. I love the little farms in Sonoma that make little bits of amazing cheese. I love goat milk cheese. As a matter of fact, from Wednesday to Friday of last week, I’d been living cheese and crackers or bread for dinner. I could not survive without cheese. Wine requires cheese. Beer requires cheese. My life requires cheese. The idea of a vegan red velvet cupcake with substitute cream cheese icing was painful.
That was it. Off the table. Well, not completely. I found this website in my travels last night. There are some amazing little recipes on there and I will certainly try some of them out. I think it would be ok to add some vegan meals into my repertoire and I’m going to do that. I do love beans in almost all forms. I eat more in the winter than the summer and that seems like a good plan. But I can go all in for all the reason stated above. And right now I don’t have to, my latest cholesterol test with the blood bank came back at 153. I’m good.
I met a gal at a wine event last week, which I will talk about in a day or so, but this is time sensitive. She told me about Cold Soup Week. What? Yeah, it’s a social media thing, but conceptually it is very interesting. She knows Chef White so it makes it more interesting. And I’m going to try a couple of these this week.
And now Tiffany, the news.