Stuck on Stupid

Blocking out the scenery breaking my mind

Oh, you need to hear just one more rant from me this month?  Lucky you!  I’ve got a topic.  And it’s not these knuckleheads.  God is good.

But Chase Bank, now that’s another story.  I’ve got a lot to say about these guys in the first place.  Many of the REO’s I rolled up on over the last couple of years were Chase owned.  On numerous occasions the homeowner told me they had a short sale or an approved loan modification.  One department was doing a work out and the other was foreclosing on the property.  My opinion of the way they are handling this mess is they are a stuffed shirt East Coast bank that doesn’t see their customers as human beings.  As far as they’re concerned they need to take back these homes as quickly as possible, throw these people out and dump the non-performing asset off the books.  And for the love of God, never wrinkle their freshly pressed shirt.

Now I find myself on the other side of one of them.  I’ve got a client who needs to short sale her home.  Simple enough.  Prior to calling me, she went through the Home Affordable program and tried a HAMP modification.  She was denied.  The next step is a HAFA short sale.  Lucky for everyone, I’m HAFA certified so I took the listing.  We sent the HAFA package off to Chase on October 4th.  I called about a week later to be sure the package arrived.  “I’m sorry we can’t give you that information”.  I just want to know if the package has arrived.  “We cannot give you that information without the last four digits of the borrowers social security number.  OK, so I go get the last four digits of her social security number and call them back.

“I’m sorry, we can’t give you that information”.

Why the hell not?

“We don’t have an authorization for you to talk to us on this account.”

Don’t you have the HAFA package with my listing agreement in it?

“I can’t access that information.”

I’m the listing agent.  The property is on the market.  Can’t you tell me if you received the package or not?

“No, we need a letter signed by the borrower with, are you writing this down? Her full name as it appears on the loan, the laon number, her SSN, the property address, your name and full address and phone number.”

You can’t tell me if you even have it?

“Not without authorization to talk to you about her account”.

So I drive out there and get the piece of paper and fax it to Chase.  Not once, but twice.  I wait a week and call.

“I’m sorry we don’t have an authorization to talk to you about this account.”

I sent it to you twice on the 20th of October.

“I’m sorry we don’t have it, can you refax it to this other number?”


“Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Help me with?  You haven’t helped me yet.  Don’t infer that you’ve done anything helpful because you haven’t.

“I’m sorry you feel this way Ma’am.  Have a nice day.”

So I fax the authorization to the number she gives me, wait a week and call back. Now I have her full SSN so I get further into the system.

I’m calling to talk to someone about the HAFA package I submitted on behalf of my client last October 4th.  (Soon I will need to reference the year the way this is going)

“I’m sorry we don’t have an authorization to talk to you about this account.”

I’ve sent it three times.  How in God’s green earth could you possibly not have it?

“What fax number did you send it to Ma’am”

Every one you gave me.  I sent it to these three numbers, most recently the 614 number.

“Well this is a Heritage loan, that phone number is for Washington Mutual assets”.

Then why the hell did you people tell me to send it there?

“I’m sorry for the inconvenience Ma’am.  You’ll have to fax it to these other numbers”

Are you clowns going to be sorry for the inconvenience when after now five soon to be 8 copies of this document were faxed to your office but you continue to lose them and foreclose on my clients home?  Are you going to still be sorry then or do you even give a damn?

“I’m sorry you feel that way Ma’am.  If you could please refax the authorization to our office…”

I just did.  Three more times.  Do you have it?

“It takes 5-7 days to process”

Can I email it to you so that you can discuss this with me?

“No.  It has to be an approved authorization”

I can’t email this document to you and have you answer the simple question of whether or not you have received the HAFA package?

“No.  Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Help me with?  You haven’t helped me yet.  Don’t infer that you’ve done anything helpful because you haven’t.

And that’s where we stand as of right now.  I’ve been calling for two months and Chase has yet to speak to me about a HAFA package that I sent to them on October 4th with a copy of the listing agreement to me in it.  That’s how bad they are.


  • OldTitleGuy

    It’s Obama’s fault. You don’t remember this sort of thing happening in the Reagan administration.

    Suppose there is a title claim for a HELOC TD taken out two owners ago, never reconveyed, and now foreclosing. Try getting THAT lender to talk to you. Even if you just want to pay it off. No SSN, no talkie. Try tracking down that old borrower and getting him/her to give you their SSN so you can get a demand.

    Facepalm is a way of life.

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