Now it’s full of evil clowns

Some times.  Unfortunately.  Some times you have a front seat to a bad wreck.  I had one.  Today it came to a rest.  The damage is done.

I had a friend who I’ve known since the mid 80’s.  We called her Princess, which is what I will call her for the sake of this discussion.  She was a riot.  One of the funniest people I have ever known.  We did some of the silliest things.  As this settles into my brain I’ll remember them all.  She used to say “Why get married?  Why don’t you just go find someone you hate and buy them a house?”

We went to her baby shower dressed like Stepford wives and offered everyone Jello shots.  If they refused we’d whiz around saying “I thought we were friends!   I thought we were friends!”.

And then something terrible happened.  She lost her mind.  They’re right, a mind is a terrible thing to lose.  She thought her husband had listening devices throughout the house.  She spun a good story, it was almost believable.  She wanted me to sell her house.  I realized two weeks into the process she didn’t have the legal capacity to sign an offer if I got one.  She listed the house two other times and never sold it.  It was foreclosed on a couple of weeks ago.  She was supposed to have moved out exactly two weeks ago.  She was found face down in one of the rooms of that house.  

When she broke up with her husband, she moved out.  She didn’t want to leave her gun there but didn’t have anywhere to keep it.  I agreed to hold it.  It was a freaking cannon.  A .357 magnum.  Once I realized she had lost her mind I didn’t want to give her back the gun.  Her disease made her tear everything out of every drawer and cabinet searching for something she could never name.  She would put everything into a big pile in the middle of the room.  I had visions of her leaving that gun in that pile and her 4yo shooting himself.  I refused to return the gun directly to her.  Under advisement from The Brother, I handed the gun over to the Walnut Creek Police who never returned it to her.  Last I heard she was still telling everybody I stole her gun, even though she was the one who told me which officer to give it to.

Her husband in an effort to spare his son, took video of some of the insanity.  There’s a video of her trying to climb in through a doggy door and her son screaming “Daddy, don’t call the cops on her, give her one more chance.”  Gutwrenching shit.

Her mother drove out to her home today and found her, face down in her son’s room.  And gone.  The vacuum was still running.  She was supposed to be out of the house two weeks ago.

Princess, I really hope those demons didn’t follow you to the grave.  I hope you’re free, and kicking it.

As soon as your born they make you feel small

Not to be a jerk, but what the hell.

The tin foil brigade wants to invoke God at every juncture.  Well, God just kicked your ass.  So instead of asking the federal government for help, since you didn’t want to help out the victims of Hurricane Sandy, why don’t you just go pray?  And let God sort it out.  He will provide.  What do you need my tax dollars for anyway?  You didn’t want to spend them on the eastern seaboard, now I don’t want to spend them on you.  See how that works?  It’s all fun and games until the Almighty unleashed a mile wide tornado isn’t it?

That’s the thing.  This horrible, hateful behavior in this country has consequences.  Enough is enough.  Don’t make me quote Reagan.  I hate the guy, but even a broken clock is right twice a day.

We in the United States, above all, must remember that lesson, for we were founded as a nation of openness to people of all beliefs. And so we must remain. Our very unity has been strengthened by our pluralism. We establish no religion in this country, we command no worship, we mandate no belief, nor will we ever. Church and state are, and must remain, separate. All are free to believe or not believe, all are free to practice a faith or not, and those who believe are free, and should be free, to speak of and act on their belief.

At the same time that our Constitution prohibits state establishment of religion, it protects the free exercise of all religions. And walking this fine line requires government to be strictly neutral. And government should not make it more difficult for Christians, Jews, Muslims, or other believing people to practice their faith. And that’s why, when the Connecticut Supreme Court struck down a statute — and you may not have heard about this; it was a statute protecting employees who observed the Sabbath. Well, our administration is now urging the United States Supreme Court to overturn the Connecticut Court decision. This is what I mean by freedom of religion, and that’s what we feel the Constitution intends.

Moreover, if these idiots would spend less time preaching fire, brimstone and fear and more time teaching the love that Jesus taught, we’d all be better off.

Luke 6:20-21 Then he looked up at his disciples and said: ‘Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God. ‘Blessed are you who are hungry now, for you will be filled. ‘Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh.

So I was pretty blessed through 2009, 2010 and 2011.  Or maybe the lesson is simply “don’t be an asshole”.Actually, I was never hungry or homeless.  I just spent a lot of time dodging phone calls.

Mark 10:21-22 Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said, “You lack one thing; go, sell what you own, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me.” When he heard this, he was shocked and went away grieving, for he had many possessions.

Wow.  Jesus said “Live simply”.  Who knew?  Of course then there’s the assclown in Tennessee who takes 2 Thessalonians out of context.  In an effort to cut welfare he says that the Bible says if “you don’t work you don’t eat.”  Not exactly.

Now we command you, brethren, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you [f]keep away from every brother who[g]leads an [h]unruly life and not according to the tradition which [i]you received from us. For you yourselves know how you ought to [j]follow our example, because we did not act in an undisciplined manner among you, nor did we eat[k]anyone’s bread [l]without paying for it, but with labor and hardship we kept working night and day so that we would not be a burden to any of you; not because we do not have the right to this, but in order to offer ourselves as a model for you, so that you would [m]follow our example. 10 For even when we were with you, we used to give you this order: if anyone is not willing to work, then he is not to eat, either. 11 For we hear that some among you are leading an undisciplined life, doing no work at all, but acting like busybodies. 12 Now such persons we command and exhort in the Lord Jesus Christ to work in quiet fashion and eat their own bread. 13 But as for you, brethren, do not grow weary of doing good.

It doesn’t say to starve people who don’t have jobs.  It says you should take pride in yourself and not be a burden.  Big difference numbnuts.  And of course your clay footed god told you not to mix church and state.  The douchery is off the charts.

The Bible says that the richest 1% in this country should give everything away before coming to the table of God.  How do you like me now?  So paying their fair share of taxes to lift up those in poverty would be a good thing according to the good book.  You want to commingle church and state?  OK, then let’s read the whole Bible, including the New Testament.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

You say Rolls I say Royce

I kind of feel like I owe you a rant about umbrellas.

Best yet.  Sarah Palin tweets  “Mr. President, when it rains it pours, but most Americans hold their own umbrellas ”

Seriously.  1) who gives a crap? 2) Did you asshats forget that Obama is the President of the United States AND the Commander in Chief?  So USMC uniform regulations state says that  Marines don’t use umbrellas but you’re missing the point all of you tin foil capped little numbnuts.

The President noted that he had a change of clothes but the Turkish minister might not.  So this is the result.  Kindly stfu.

Now on the cycling.  The Amgen blew through these parts yesterday.  I didn’t get to see any of it because I was out on this adventure.

That’s 102 miles to the Jelly Belly Factory and back.  I’ve never been inside the factory, mostly because their suport of Rick Santorum.  I don’t even use their sports beans any more which is sad because 1) I like them 2) they work.  But I can’t support a company that supports Santorum.  It was our turn around.  Weather was very nice yesterday, nothing like the past three weeks of 90+ temperatures.  I came home and wasn’t completely wiped out.  Yep.  I rode 102 miles yesterday, got home and wasn’t completely wiped.  We finished 35 minutes in front of last weeks time, once again due to the heat.  Or lack thereof.  It was a more enjoyable ride than the last three by leaps and bound.

I have about $1100 more to raise to meet the minimum.  If you haven’t seen this on facebook and contributed, this link, this one will set you up.  Thanks for your support.

Summer fling, don’t mean a thing

I did a century yesterday.

There were times yesterday when I thought I would just collapse and fall off of the bike. It was so friggin’ hot out there. It was in the high 90’s when we left Sunol to head out Calaveras. Then it got really hot. 7400 feet of climbing. It was just brutal. Worse than anything on the ride itself, which is good. That means we are in shape for the ride. I did it all but I wanted to quit. I rarely want to quit. When we stopped at Safeway in Pleasanton I downed a big thing of coconut water and grabbed another one in Danville. The thing is, I actually got stronger at the end. I put down close to 300oz of fluid yesterday and did not have the potty stops to support that. Way too hot.

You can donate to support this lunacy here.

This is old but adorable.  Kind of like me.

In truth, I hate Grease.

Collini out.

Kill the headlights and put it in neutral

Sometimes I wonder, which one is the real Satan.  Is it Rick Scott?  Could it be Jan Brewer?  Or Chris Christie?

Rick Scott has brought us the less than successful welfare drug testing program.  Yep, 96% totally clean at a great expense to the State of Florida which actually exceeded the cost of the program.  Well played asshat.  The truth is that the right wing narrative that welfare recipients are just sitting around on their ass taking your tax dollars and smoking weed all day turned out to be doo doo.  The truth is that most of society would prefer to carry their own weight.  Even the black people.  And the Mexicans.  And the immigrants.  Who knew?

Funny thing about those immigrants, they work harder than the folks who are born here.  As a matter of fact 40% of the Fortune 500 companies in 2011 were founded by…wait for it…immigrants or first generation Americans.  So Jan Brewer and all those other shriveled up nasty people in Arizona need to just STFU.

Chris, I want to like you, that’s the weird thing about you, I want to like you.  You make it so hard.  He termed his weight as “It’s really the only still-acceptable form of discrimination in our country.”  Really Chris?  Because James Holmes walking into a Colorado movie theater and shot 71 people.  He killed 12 and injured 48 but because he is a white boy from San Diego no one on the right is calling him a terrorist.  Those two clownshits in Boston are Muslim and the right wing is wetting themselves to call those two losers (Uncle Ruslan was right) “enemy combatants.  These guys were just two losers.

I’ll think of you each step of my way

For weeks I have been battling nature with Miss Cleo.  Three weeks ago I took her in for the second time expecting to put her down.  She hadn’t eaten in three days and was shutting down.  The vet looked at her and said “I’ll do it if you want me to, but I don’t think she’s ready to go”.  OK.  So $326 later we had some Flagyl some anti-diarrhea medication and a few days, maybe a few weeks.  We got the weeks.  Last week she started not finishing her meals again.  I started adding fresh hamburger and she ate everything.  Then she wouldn’t eat the raw burger.  So I went and bought her liver wet food and duck wet food.  And she at that.  Once.  And then she wouldn’t eat the liver wet dog food.  And then I tried to spoon feed her and she wouldn’t take it.  She got weaker and weaker, but during the day she would go outside and drink water and whiz where she was supposed to.  At night she couldn’t make the night without whizzing in the house.  She was incontinent and I couldn’t let her in the back of the house.


Yesterday when I got up her head was slung over the side of her bed.  She had wet herself again and a big puddle of drool was under her face.  I fed the other dogs, and tried to get her to get up.  She stood.  And collapsed.  I grabbed the truck keys, locked up the other dogs, scooped her up and carried her to the truck.  At 5:30am they had to bring her into the vet hospital on a stretcher.  There was no pushback from the vet.  This vet had seen Miss Cleo the first time I considered letting her go.  That was months ago now.  “You are opting euthanasia at this point?”.  Yes.

I truly believe she was hanging on because my house was the best part of her life and she didn’t want to give up her good thing.  I wish I had known her when she was young and full of life, she was an amazing dog.

I told her to look for Ike, that she had been a great dog and I loved her.  Godspeed pretty girl.