Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind

I don’t have the author for credits…but it ain’t me, so someone else gets credit.

‘. . . I’m a little confused. Let me see if I
have this straight…..

If you grow up in Hawaii, raised by your grandparents,
you’re ‘exotic, different.’

[If you] grow up in Alaska eating mooseburgers, [you
have lived the] quintessential American story.

If your name is Barack your [name is an indication of]
a radical, unpatriotic Muslim.

Graduate from Harvard law School and you are unstable.

Attend 5 different small colleges before graduating,
you’re well grounded.

If you spend 3 years as a brilliant community
organizer, become the first black President of the Harvard
Law Review, create a voter registration drive that registers
150,000 new voters, spend 12 years as a Constitutional Law
professor, spend 8 years as a State Senator representing a
district with over 750,000 people, become chairman of the
state Senate’s Health and Human Services committee,
spend 4 years in the United States Senate representing a
state of 13 million people while sponsoring 131 bills and
serving on the Foreign Affairs, Environment and Public Works
and Veteran’s Affairs committees, you don’t have any
real leadership experience.

If your total resume is: local weather girl, 4 years
on the city council and 6 years as the mayor of a town with
less than 7,000 people, 20 months as the governor of a state
with only 650,000 people, then you’re qualified to
become the country’s second highest ranking executive.

If you have been married to the same woman for 19
years while raising 2 beautiful daughters, all within
Protestant churches, you’re not a real Christian.

If you cheated on your first wife with a rich heiress,
and left your disfigured wife and married the heiress the
next month, you’re a Christian.

If you teach responsible, age appropriate sex
education, including the proper use of birth control, you
are eroding the fiber of society.

If, while governor, you staunchly advocate abstinence
only, with no other option in sex education in your
state’s school system while your unwed teen daughter
ends up pregnant , you’re very responsible.

If your wife is a Harvard graduate laywer who gave up
a position in a prestigious law firm to work for the
betterment of her inner city community, then gave that up to
raise a family, your family’s values don’t represent
America’s.

If you’re husband is nicknamed ‘First
Dude’, with at least one DWI conviction and no college
education, once was a member of a group that advocated the
secession of Alaska from the USA, your family is admirable.

OK, much clearer now. . .’

OK, I do think California should secede from the Union, then Arnie could be President or Chancellor. (The Wine Dog said, knowing full well that DolphynGyrl just spit up on her monitor)

In Other News

I’m feeling rather smug right now. I had one dog crate going into this weekend. I knew I needed a second. I’ve fallen down a little on the training here and there’s been way too much bad dog behavior. Part of it is how much time I’ve been spending getting my business up and running and part of it has been how sick I’ve been. Now, I know it seems like “my God are you sick again?” but truth be told I haven’t had a respiratory issue since February, so that’s not so bad. I know two people who had this before me. One got a respiratory infection, the other got walking pneumonia. So the fact that I didn’t train my dogs like I should have been and didn’t post here as much as usual is a small sacrifice. I’ll do better on a go forward basis. Anyway, the point of the story is that I got a phone call yesterday from a friend at a garage sale. They were selling a large dog crate in excellent shape for $50. I said offer them $35. They took it. Too quick. I should have said $30 or $25. Anyway, I now have two dog crates, both barely used for a total expenditure of $75. Oh yeah. Rita’s reign of terror on the kitchen counters has come to an end.

Tomorrow will start another powerlifting cycle in the gym. I think I’m close enough to well to start lifting again. Basically I feel fine, I’m just a little snotty. It’s out of my chest and has been out for a few days and that’s what counts. I still don’t think I can get back up Ygnacio to the house, so cycling is put off for at least another two days. Hopefully I can get the Ygnacio loop in on Tuesday. Fall seems to have arrived here which is strange. As some of you know, or may remember, we are coming up on the most hallowed of days. In 1958 it broke all the temperature records for that day…going back 100 years.  I’m sure the Old Woman is still pissed at me about that. It’s been nearly 50 years Old Girl, move on. So this faux fall is a little strange. One year it rained, but that was an aberration. This year I hope it to be warm and gorgeous. OK one year I went wine tasting and it was 109 in Napa. Here I sat with all this wine and I just wanted to go for a dip. Anyway, I didn’t get all the weight off. I have broken 200 for the first time in I think five years. Not only that, I’ve been sitting below it for over a week. I blame two things. Cycling and getting out of the title business. We all know title offices are renown for passive aggressive food behavior.  Yeah, we’re all on waivers from our Dr. but we’re going to bring in cake and cookies and chips and godonlyknows what else because we can’t be the only ones with bad cholesterol, high blood pressure and morbid obesity.  So being out of that environment has been good for me.  Secondly, I have no real income right now, I’m not running around buying things that I shouldn’t. There hasn’t been a treat in this house in probably three weeks.  I’m not stopping in at this place or that place picking up something I shouldn’t because there isn’t any wiggle room in the budget.  My last two trips to Starbucks were to get tea with honey to sooth my throat so I could make cold calls. You just don’t get results when you sound like Tallulah Bankhead or a poor man’s Lauren Bacall. Or Bea Arthur.

beaarthur.jpg

Yeah, she’s Doberman lover. I suppose if I had said “Hi, this is Bea Arthur and we met at the open house last Sunday” I might have gotten better results. We’ll see. Another good open house yesterday. I’ve got a CAR contract and I’m not afraid to use it.

And as far as signs of the apocalypse are concerned, the Board is having open enrollment for Kaiser starting October 1. That means nobody cares that I weigh 199. (see, just under) Nobody cares that I had an episode of tachycardiomyopathy last February and nobody cares about my recurring sciatica or bad knees or cranky shoulders. The price of my soul is apparently $200.81 a month.

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